College

[lonewolfz28]

If College-Themed XXX Were Real

Situation One: The Naughty Student Cindi, an attractive student with a large rack, walks up to the desk of her professor.

XXX:
Cindi: Is there anything I can do to raise this grade?
Professor: Some students do extra credit work.
Cindi: (has sex with him)

Reality:
Cindi: Is there anything I can do to raise this grade?
Professor: Some students do extra credit work.
Cindi: Like what?
Professor: A seven-to ten-page report about the economic principles behind trade rules in a Micronesian country of your choosing.
Cindi: Oh. That makes sense and is an appropriate extra credit assignment for the course.

Situation Two: The Hot Teacher

Paul, a student in his late twenties, walks up to the desk of his teacher, Professor Mandy, who has enormous breasts.

XXX:
Paul: You wanted to see me after class, professor?
Professor Mandy: Yes. I need to test your performance.
Paul: How?
Professor Mandy: (fellates Paul)

Reality:
Paul: You wanted to see me after class, professor?
Professor Mandy: Yes. I need to test your performance.
Paul: How?
Professor Mandy: A series of tests based on the material covered in this course.
Paul: Could I just have sex with you instead?
Professor Mandy: (sues Paul)

Situation Three: The Sorority

Between two and a half-dozen attractive coeds sit on a large bed, in nighties which barely contain their ample bosoms.

XXX:
Head Sorority Girl: Let's have a naked pillowfight!
Assistant Head Sorority Girl: And practice kissing!
Sorority Girls: (begin doing those things)

Reality:
I kind of assume this is what actually happens in sororities.

Situation Four: The Curious Freshman

A very attractive freshman girl named Candi sits on a bed with her boyfriend, Brett. Did I mention that Candi has boobs the size of overripe grapefruit? She does.

XXX:
Brett: Let's try anal sex.
Candi: Okay.

Reality:
Brett: Let's try anal sex.
Candi: No.

Situation Five: The Janitor

A strangely-muscular janitor knocks on the door of Bambi, a girl whose low-cut shirt reveals a veritable explosion of cleavage.

XXX:
Janitor: Do those pipes need cleaning?
Bambi: (apparently this is all the pillow talk she needs to have all kinds of sex with him)

Reality:
Janitor: Perhaps I should have stayed in school.
Bambi: I can see how you could be disappointed with your station in life.